Struggling...

I'm having an inner struggle with the blog thing. The struggle is almost to its one year anniversary. Maybe you've noticed I've lost steam. And it's becoming more impersonal. That's part of the struggle. (I'm not looking for any kind of encouragement or pep talk here. It's just the facts.)

It's a struggle to come up with blogging topics, so I'll just give you a rundown...

*you really can have tornado warnings in October. Huh. I thought it was just a test.
*if it is a nice day, jump at the chance to meet friends at the park. You never know what kind of weather the next day holds. More importantly, you will feel refreshed.
*bring on winter. I want to see some snow!!
*i love soccer. Love. I'm not good at it tho. Fantastic exercise. And it makes you sore. Maybe only if you are over 30.
*i just told Zane that if it comes down to it, I'm going to have a hard time leaving this place.
*he said you make sacrifices anywhere you live.
*i'm going to have a hard time leaving this place. If I have to. That happened quickly.
*i feel really disconnected from my sisters. But. I hate talking on the phone and they work during the day, anyway. That's the thing. The reason to move back. Family.
*still up in the air about Thanksgiving in MN. I hate that. I'm a planner.
*i'm spending these windy days curled up on my couch with a stack of books and a cup of coffee. Sigh. Does it get any better than that? I didn't think so.

Waiting. Waiting. Waiting on my world to change.

I need a change.
I know, right? Weird. (I never said I wasn't.)
It's just that every couple years, I feel the need to make a huge life change. I don't know why, I just do. I started exercising. Dave Ramsey. That type of thing. Moving doesn't count.
I never said you had to understand it. You just need to know it. It's who I am.
I think it's just boredom. Restlessness. The baby is getting bigger and requires less of me, leaving me with more time. Time that I need to fill. I need a goal. Or a hobby. A life changing hobby. Something.
What is it that I need?
Is it strange to you that I feel my life is at a crossroads? I do. And I don't even know what the crossroads are. I keep tossing around the idea of going back to school- that one has been simmering for years. However. That still wouldn't be until next fall, leaving my current feelings unfulfilled.
I guess all of this is a good thing: it means I am feeling settled into my life here.
Settled, yet not.

It's a laughing matter.

I joined soccer. I'm a soccer mom.
Good. I'm glad you responded like that.
I was hoping to start your Monday off with a good belly laugh.
Just don't tell my team that I joined mainly for the exercise.
Truth is, I have never played soccer in my life. Except maybe in PE in school.
Laughing burns calories. You have my permission.

rain on the parade

Do you know that -supposedly- one of the miners wives showed up to wait for her husband's rescue? And so did his girlfriend? Oops.

Challenge: Days 7-11

Ina Garten. You know what you are doing, lady. If gaining weight and clogging arteries are your specialty. Or making purely sinful, yet delicious food.

Good & evil recipes:

Wheat berry Salad: (Okay, admittedly, this one isn't evil. It's just good. Different, but fantastic- it blew my mind. Not good as leftovers.)

1 cup hard winter wheat berries (I used bulgur wheat and prepared it according to pkg direct.)

kosher salt

1 cup finely diced red onion

6 tbsp good olive oil, divided

2 tbsp balsamic vinegar

3 scallions, minced, white and green parts

1/2 red bell pepper, small-diced

1 carrot, small diced

1/4 tsp freshly ground black pepper

Place the wheat berries and 3 cups of boiling salted water in saucepan and cook, uncovered, over low heat for approx. 45 min or until they are soft. Drain.

Saute the red onion in 2 tbsp of olive oil over med-low heat until translucent, approx 5 min. Turn off the heat and add the remaining 4 tbsp of olive oil and balsamic vinegar.

In a large bowl, combine the warm wheat berries with remaining ingredients. Allow the salad to sit for at least 30 min for the wheat berries to absorb sauce. Season to taste and serve at room temperature.

Mashed Yellow Turnips with crispy shallots-

Mediocre. Basically mashed rutabaga, prepared in the same way you would do mashed potatoes. If you want me to post the recipe, I can.

Sagaponack Corn Pudding -(This also blew my mind. Amazing. Makes a lot, tho.)

1 stick unsalted butter

5 cups fresh corn kernels off the cob (6-8 ears) or frozen corn

1 cup chopped yellow onion

4 extra large eggs

1 cup milk

1 cup half and half

1/2 cup yellow cornmeal

1 cup ricotta cheese

3 tbsp chopped fresh basil

1 tbsp sugar

1 tbsp kosher salt (Next time, I'll cut back on this. It was a titch salty)

3/4 tsp pepper

3/4 c grated cheddar, plus extra to sprinkle on top

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Grease the inside of an 8-10 cup baking dish.

Melt the butter in a large saute pan and saute the born and onion over med-high heat for 4 min. Cool slightly.

Whisk together the eggs, milk, and half and half in a large bowl. Slowly whisk in the cornmeal and then the ricotta. Add the basil, sugar, salt and pepper. Add the cooked corn mixture and cheese and then pour into the baking dish. Sprinkle top with cheese.

Place the dish in a larger pan and fill the pan halfway up the sides of the dish with hot tap water. Bake the pudding for 40-45 min until the top begins to brown and a knife inserted in the center comes out clean. Serve warm.

Potato Basil Frittata- (pictured)

(This is a great one to make for out of town company. I loved it. In advance: Yes, Aimee. I will.)

8 tbsp unsalted butter, divided (I couldn't. I used less.)

2 cups peeled and 1/2 inch diced boiling potatoes

8 extra large eggs

15 oz ricotta cheese

3/4 lb Gruyere cheese, grated (White cheddar would make a cheaper substitute)

1/2 tsp kosher salt

1/2 tsp pepper

3/4 chopped fresh basil

1/3 cup all purpose flour

3/4 tsp baking powder

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Melt 3 tbsp of the butter. Fry potatoes until cooked through, 10-15 min. Melt the remaining butter in a small dish.

Meanwhile, whisk the eggs in a large bowl, then stir in ricotta, Gruyere, butter, salt, pepper and basil. Sprinkle the flour and baking powder and stir into egg mixture.

Grease a baking dish. Cover bottom with potatoes and pour egg mixture over. Bake the frittata until it is browned and puffed, 50-60 min. It will be rounded and firm in the middle and a knife inserted in the frittata should come out clean. Serve hot.

I was going to post the last one: Raspberry Cheesecake. But I haven't actually made it yet. Heh. So I better wait. For my recipe number eleven, I will tell you that I made a Pulled Pork recipe. It wasn't anything to write home about. Or, in this case, blog about. (Not from Ina.)

All in all? "Barefoot Contessa Family Style" is a good cookbook. The recipes are mostly fantastic. As with any celebrity chef/ Foodnetwork Star, you get great bang for your buck, just not a lot of bang. I guess you can skimp on the sheer number of recipes when you have credibility as a buffer.

For Kim, Bonnie, Sabrina & Damon:

This is Damon. I never had the honor of knowing him. I have, however, had the honor of knowing his family. And if he was a fraction like any of them, and I suspect he was, he was an amazing person. He made the ultimate sacrifice for New Mexico and for the greater good of our nation and world. We can never thank him or his family enough. I wish I could take away their pain. Since I cannot, the offer of my shoulder for them to cry on will always stand.


I learned so much from Sabrina and her family. How to take a tragedy and turn it into something beautiful. They honored Damon and other law enforcement officials with beautiful luncheons. The community generously donated for the cause. (I daresay that I learned enough from y'all to organize an event myself!) Did anyone ever thank you for honoring them? Thank you! And thank you for being my family away from my family! Love you forever. Extra, extra love and hugs to you this month. And to Levi, Garrett and Kylee. And Marno. (Who, hey! Is you Grandma! ;) ) And anyone else in your family.

There are many people who serve our country in so many different ways. People who are willing to sacrifice for our country. Who do make the ultimate sacrifice for our country. And those who love and support them. Thank you to all of them.

Challenge: days 1-4

It's only just beginning and I am already realizing that a new recipe for each day of the month is exactly what I called it: a challenge. Did I say one each day? Because I meant that loosely as: one for each day. Some days I double, even triple up. Just in case I don't try something new one day. Like yesterday, for instance.

And the first four:

1. Crockpot Oatmeal: Doozy! I wanted something that would be waiting for us when we awoke in the morning. We use mostly steel cut oats, so when I found a recipe for it- voila! Or so I thought. I won't give up. I think with a few adjustments, I could perfect this. Or I'll just stick to the Baked Oatmeal I love, even if I have to wake up early to put it in the oven. Hmmph.

2. PW's Cinnamon Bread: Fantastic for those of you who did not grow up with Nissu or Pulla. Whatever your family calls it. Which is, essentially, Cinnamon Bread with Cardamom. This would actually taste really great with a little powdered sugar frosting. Which would make it equal to the stuff my mom buys at The Marketplace bakery. If you look at it that way- definitely a keeper.

3. Earthquake Cake: This was the cake that was so dangerous. Proceed with caution. It will ruin your weight loss/management dreams.

4. Pecan Crusted Salmon: WHY HAVEN'T YOU ALREADY MADE THIS?! YOU HAVEN'T LIVED UNTIL YOU DO!!!!

Yes, I yelled that. And even your 3 year old will eat it if you tell him/her that it is pink chicken.
I'm actually thoroughly enjoying this new recipe thing and my family claims they are, too. We'll see if they say that at the end of the month! Ha! (Thanks to Anne and PW. No thanks to the lady from the newspaper.)