a right and a left make a wrong

Who was the brainiac that decided they were going to revolutionize the left hand turn here in Michigan? Obviously someone that was not born here, as we all know that people born in MI are smarter than that. And, no, I am not saying that just because I was born a yooper. You are so jaded. Sheesh.

But, about the left hand turn. It wasn't until I came here, that I realized just taking a left hand turn when you need to go left makes the least amount of sense. Apparently. It makes way more sense to take a right, drive a 1/4 mile out of your way, make a left/u-turn (aren't they usually discouraged and/or illegal?) and then drive back that 1/4 mile and keep on going. I mean, who wouldn't want to make all those extra turns and drive an extra 1/2 mile? Duh. So obvious.

I just want to know how that train of thought started. Really. Was it like: "You know, I find taking a normal left hand turn at a stoplight to be highly boring. We should jazz it up a bit. What could I do..." Or, "Ugh. I'm way too important to wait for the left hand turn arrow to turn green. I would feel way better if I was at least moving. I will add an extra loop in my drive, just so to keep me and my important self in motion. It's probably quicker, too." OR. "You know, I really want to make a name for myself. I'm going to change the way people think about left hand turns. What could I do to make the greatest impact?" And it's probably the same person that decided to not put the street names in the intersections at stoplights in H****l. They clearly belong 100 yards before the intersection.

I, mean, really? It's no wonder we pay so many taxes. Because, honestly, just adding that left arrow probably doesn't add that much of an expense vs the MI left. Am I missing something here?

Apparently somewhere else in this great country, a village is missing their idiot. I'm just sayin'.

True to form

Because I always feel the need to explain myself, I'll give you some of my struggles:

*stage fright. I meet people and they say they read my blog. I'm flattered. Yet it scares me. They already have formed an opinion of me, without actually hearing the flow of my words and the different inflections of my voice. Were the words a song? Was it off key? Or perfect pitch? That is scary. And still flattering.

*I've made people feel things that I never meant them to. Including being offended. I hate that. In a I-can't-get-past-it kind of way. Seriously. I've tried. And I can't. I find myself avoiding topics because of it. Leaving this blog as a less than authentic piece of me. A place to post the names of good books, recipes and not much more.

*writing, to me, is therapeutic. I take my anger and put it into words. Black and white. And I let it stew in virtual space. And when I'm ready, I delete it into oblivion. And that ugliness in me goes with it. Usually. You don't see it. Would I really want to show you that side of me? Nah.

*and I don't share with you how gorgeously delicious I find my husband to be. Or any of the things he does for me, lest you think I'm bragging. I would be. You might think I'm trying to convince you of something. Even though I wouldn't be. I used to think that about people, but I don't now. Okay. Maybe sometimes.

*I want to be more personal. I want to record my life and I want to remember, ten years down the road, how I felt on this day. And I'm sort of left with the fact that maybe what I actually need is a diary. Not a for-all-to-see diary. A just-for-me-to-see diary. And maybe my husband and kids.

*I read other people's blogs and love their words. And wish I had thought of them. A part of me realizes that we all have different words. Our own style of words. Just because mine are different isn't necessarily a bad thing. But, come on? Who can compare to some of these bloggers? Seriously?!

Yet. I have gained so much with this blog. A sharing of myself. Insight from you. A network of blogging friends, that I otherwise wouldn't have had. A network of blogging friends. The biggest gain, by far. I really truly enjoy it.

You see where I'm going with this? I'm not bringing this up to eek a pep talk out of you or gain a compliment. I'm just trying to explain this inner battle I've had and if some day you try to pop onto my blog and it's not there, you will know why. You'll know which side won. Or continues to win. Maybe I should have explained this a long time ago, I'm already starting to feel better.

Sigh. There I go again. I wish I was a decisive person.

Struggling...

I'm having an inner struggle with the blog thing. The struggle is almost to its one year anniversary. Maybe you've noticed I've lost steam. And it's becoming more impersonal. That's part of the struggle. (I'm not looking for any kind of encouragement or pep talk here. It's just the facts.)

It's a struggle to come up with blogging topics, so I'll just give you a rundown...

*you really can have tornado warnings in October. Huh. I thought it was just a test.
*if it is a nice day, jump at the chance to meet friends at the park. You never know what kind of weather the next day holds. More importantly, you will feel refreshed.
*bring on winter. I want to see some snow!!
*i love soccer. Love. I'm not good at it tho. Fantastic exercise. And it makes you sore. Maybe only if you are over 30.
*i just told Zane that if it comes down to it, I'm going to have a hard time leaving this place.
*he said you make sacrifices anywhere you live.
*i'm going to have a hard time leaving this place. If I have to. That happened quickly.
*i feel really disconnected from my sisters. But. I hate talking on the phone and they work during the day, anyway. That's the thing. The reason to move back. Family.
*still up in the air about Thanksgiving in MN. I hate that. I'm a planner.
*i'm spending these windy days curled up on my couch with a stack of books and a cup of coffee. Sigh. Does it get any better than that? I didn't think so.

Waiting. Waiting. Waiting on my world to change.

I need a change.
I know, right? Weird. (I never said I wasn't.)
It's just that every couple years, I feel the need to make a huge life change. I don't know why, I just do. I started exercising. Dave Ramsey. That type of thing. Moving doesn't count.
I never said you had to understand it. You just need to know it. It's who I am.
I think it's just boredom. Restlessness. The baby is getting bigger and requires less of me, leaving me with more time. Time that I need to fill. I need a goal. Or a hobby. A life changing hobby. Something.
What is it that I need?
Is it strange to you that I feel my life is at a crossroads? I do. And I don't even know what the crossroads are. I keep tossing around the idea of going back to school- that one has been simmering for years. However. That still wouldn't be until next fall, leaving my current feelings unfulfilled.
I guess all of this is a good thing: it means I am feeling settled into my life here.
Settled, yet not.

It's a laughing matter.

I joined soccer. I'm a soccer mom.
Good. I'm glad you responded like that.
I was hoping to start your Monday off with a good belly laugh.
Just don't tell my team that I joined mainly for the exercise.
Truth is, I have never played soccer in my life. Except maybe in PE in school.
Laughing burns calories. You have my permission.

rain on the parade

Do you know that -supposedly- one of the miners wives showed up to wait for her husband's rescue? And so did his girlfriend? Oops.

Challenge: Days 7-11

Ina Garten. You know what you are doing, lady. If gaining weight and clogging arteries are your specialty. Or making purely sinful, yet delicious food.

Good & evil recipes:

Wheat berry Salad: (Okay, admittedly, this one isn't evil. It's just good. Different, but fantastic- it blew my mind. Not good as leftovers.)

1 cup hard winter wheat berries (I used bulgur wheat and prepared it according to pkg direct.)

kosher salt

1 cup finely diced red onion

6 tbsp good olive oil, divided

2 tbsp balsamic vinegar

3 scallions, minced, white and green parts

1/2 red bell pepper, small-diced

1 carrot, small diced

1/4 tsp freshly ground black pepper

Place the wheat berries and 3 cups of boiling salted water in saucepan and cook, uncovered, over low heat for approx. 45 min or until they are soft. Drain.

Saute the red onion in 2 tbsp of olive oil over med-low heat until translucent, approx 5 min. Turn off the heat and add the remaining 4 tbsp of olive oil and balsamic vinegar.

In a large bowl, combine the warm wheat berries with remaining ingredients. Allow the salad to sit for at least 30 min for the wheat berries to absorb sauce. Season to taste and serve at room temperature.

Mashed Yellow Turnips with crispy shallots-

Mediocre. Basically mashed rutabaga, prepared in the same way you would do mashed potatoes. If you want me to post the recipe, I can.

Sagaponack Corn Pudding -(This also blew my mind. Amazing. Makes a lot, tho.)

1 stick unsalted butter

5 cups fresh corn kernels off the cob (6-8 ears) or frozen corn

1 cup chopped yellow onion

4 extra large eggs

1 cup milk

1 cup half and half

1/2 cup yellow cornmeal

1 cup ricotta cheese

3 tbsp chopped fresh basil

1 tbsp sugar

1 tbsp kosher salt (Next time, I'll cut back on this. It was a titch salty)

3/4 tsp pepper

3/4 c grated cheddar, plus extra to sprinkle on top

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Grease the inside of an 8-10 cup baking dish.

Melt the butter in a large saute pan and saute the born and onion over med-high heat for 4 min. Cool slightly.

Whisk together the eggs, milk, and half and half in a large bowl. Slowly whisk in the cornmeal and then the ricotta. Add the basil, sugar, salt and pepper. Add the cooked corn mixture and cheese and then pour into the baking dish. Sprinkle top with cheese.

Place the dish in a larger pan and fill the pan halfway up the sides of the dish with hot tap water. Bake the pudding for 40-45 min until the top begins to brown and a knife inserted in the center comes out clean. Serve warm.

Potato Basil Frittata- (pictured)

(This is a great one to make for out of town company. I loved it. In advance: Yes, Aimee. I will.)

8 tbsp unsalted butter, divided (I couldn't. I used less.)

2 cups peeled and 1/2 inch diced boiling potatoes

8 extra large eggs

15 oz ricotta cheese

3/4 lb Gruyere cheese, grated (White cheddar would make a cheaper substitute)

1/2 tsp kosher salt

1/2 tsp pepper

3/4 chopped fresh basil

1/3 cup all purpose flour

3/4 tsp baking powder

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Melt 3 tbsp of the butter. Fry potatoes until cooked through, 10-15 min. Melt the remaining butter in a small dish.

Meanwhile, whisk the eggs in a large bowl, then stir in ricotta, Gruyere, butter, salt, pepper and basil. Sprinkle the flour and baking powder and stir into egg mixture.

Grease a baking dish. Cover bottom with potatoes and pour egg mixture over. Bake the frittata until it is browned and puffed, 50-60 min. It will be rounded and firm in the middle and a knife inserted in the frittata should come out clean. Serve hot.

I was going to post the last one: Raspberry Cheesecake. But I haven't actually made it yet. Heh. So I better wait. For my recipe number eleven, I will tell you that I made a Pulled Pork recipe. It wasn't anything to write home about. Or, in this case, blog about. (Not from Ina.)

All in all? "Barefoot Contessa Family Style" is a good cookbook. The recipes are mostly fantastic. As with any celebrity chef/ Foodnetwork Star, you get great bang for your buck, just not a lot of bang. I guess you can skimp on the sheer number of recipes when you have credibility as a buffer.